by Julian Schultz
julian@oxfordwineroom.com

             

Said Jack the Sipper to Susu Supine, "I prefer luscious, titillating, seductive women like you; then close to your behind, my dear, I love Burgundy wines; and that's why I am here, all the way from sophisticated Natick to attend this Webster House dinner, which I rarely forgo."

Answered Susu Supine, "Well, tired me after having been on my back too long, I am now revitalized and I eagerly anticipate these rich, mellow Burgundy wines and the superb food that Chef John Hammerstrom creates to complement these wines. I also try to attend all the Webster House wine dinners."

These two Burgundy wine lovers were ushered to my table by mine host Chris Liazos because I am a Chevalier du Tastevin and would be compatible with them about Burgundy wines.

I said to Jack, "Why ever did François Villon cry out, 'to hell with Burgundy!?' "

Jack: "He wasn't speaking about the wines, but about the region and its people; and anyway he should be remembered for his greatest romantic poem."

Susu grimacing: "Oh? Romantic poetry is what put me on my back - a less than blessed experience, believe me. Can you quote it?"

Jack: "If I were king, ah love, if I were king, what tributary nations I would bring to kneel before your scepter and swear allegiance to your lips, and eyes, and hair. Beneath your feet, what treasures I would fling: you should have the stars as pearls upon a string and the world as a ruby for your finger ring, and you should have the sun and the moon to wear, if I were king.

"And out there somewhere I hear a shepherd's song, a simple song, a sylvan air of love that ever finds your face more fair. I could not give you any godlier thing...if...I...were...king."

I leaped from my chair to catch Susu who was about to swoon from her chair and on to her back.

(All wines discussed here are available at O'Hara's Discount Liquors at 20-percent reduced prices.)

Reception course: We were sipping Olivier LeFlaive's Bourgogne Blanc "Les Setilles" 2004, $14.39, reception wine - steely, dry, crisp, medium body, tropical fruits -- and eating melted Gruyere cheese in feather light phyllo puffs stuffed with asparagus when Jack said disdainfully that he decries his timid fellow Bostonian Chevaliers:

"My lofty Boston Chevalier counterparts should have ventured here despite their misgivings about trekking to the 'wild hills of woeful Worcester.' Some cynics say it is called 'worm town, and who wants to consort with worms?' And they are apprehensive that 'scalp-happy Indians might be lurking in ambush to deprive them of their hair.'

"They would have enjoyed this menu of six Burgundies and matching food courses. And I can vouch for the success of this dinner. Ever since I've attended them, never once was any dinner here short of a resounding success."

Perfection: the first main course pairing of Coquilles St. Jacques scallops and Olivier LeFlaive Rully 2004, $19.99 - strength, finesse, hazelnuts, violets hint, crisp acidity, balanced, smooth texture. The large tender scallops, deliciously prepared with sprigs of chives, sautéed mushrooms and gently seasoned in white-sauced crust, were as enjoyable as any scallops dish I have eaten...anywhere!

Susu: "When I was at Wellesley I remember dripsy drooling boy friends taking me to Boston's renowned dining tables: the Boston Harbor Hotel, Joseph's, Four Seasons, Copley Plaza, Meriden, Ritz-Carlton.

"Yet, here in little old Worcester town, this unprepossessing Webster House - not a famed restaurant of elevated nose, not an austere dining venue of supercilious pretension - is everything and more than its Boston or Providence counterparts, and at considerably less the price. I am constrained to add: its ever smiling, courteous, eager-to-please waitstaff - tonight Ann Robert and Patti Thomas -- serves food and wine and clears tables of dishes and glasses with lightning speed."

Jack, suddenly stiffened, gaped, ecstatic with excitement: "Look! Look Susu!! Here -- coming in!!! -- are three of my Boston Chevalier friends -- the fearsome threesome -- Jason, Gurko and Wembley. I had implored them to attend this dinner with me; they sniffed loftily at my urging and turned from me snickering with derision... Humm, I guess the Potel and Olivier LeFlaive Burgundies were too tempting for them to ignore. Gurko here always boasts that he can resist everything except temptation."

Susu: "Yes, Jack, I agree, it must be the wines. Being Chevaliers they are familiar with their merit. Introduce me and I will ask them."

As Jack approached, they greeted him with studied, stone-faced indifference - as though he were unknown to them. They acknowledged Susu warmly, however. And why not? Susu is firm of figure, rounded in right of places, short of skimpy skirt, tight of blouse and bra-less underneath; she projects a seductive insouciance and smiles provocatively.

She asked with resistance-melting eyes and breath-arresting smiles: "Why do you, proud Chevaliers, members of the most exclusive wine confrerie in the world, desert your cherished shrines of delectable dining and deign to favor Worcester's Webster House?"

Replies from each: "We did listen to Brother Jack's hype of the dinner, contrary to what he thought." "It would be unforgivable and heretical of us to forgo our revered Burgundies." "And if the dinner were less than we what were led to believe, we would paddle his posterior with a knobbed vine stock."

Second course: Coq au Vin, oven sautéed chicken with vegetables - fried onion rings, mushrooms, carrots -- in Burgundy wine sauce, served on buttered noodles; accompanied by Vincent Morgon "Charmes" 2004, $17.59 -- one of only 10 Beaujolais Grand Crus -- meaty, full-mouthed, fruit-loaded, reminiscent of cherries, berries, plums, apricots, magnificently balanced with racy acidity and soft tannins; viscous swallow and long aftertaste. Jack's Bostonians nodded approvingly.

Third main course: baked tomato stuffed with varied seasoned vegetables - an outstanding novel culinary conception - was escorted by two wines: Nicolas Potel Premier Cru Santenay from Clos Rousseau 2003, $37.59 - licorice-tinged cherry and spice, chewy texture, long finish -- and LeFlaive's magnificent Meursault 2004, $33.59 - almonds, hazelnuts, peach, pear, tropical fruit; balanced with toasty oak, lemon, crisp acidity. To laud this combination as "outstanding," "delicious," "superb" would be understatement. And Jack's Bostonians acknowledged the dish and wines with rounded thumb and forefinger enthusiastically thrust in his direction.

While waiting for the main course of Potel's Cote de Nuits Villages with beef tenderloin, I observed Wembley staring, studying Susu: "Susu, obviously you are well educated and gracefully comfortable at attended boards, and yet... yet I note a suspicious wariness, a protective hardness, an earthy grim bitterness beneath your seemingly frivolous demeanor. I wager you have a story within you, as do most of us; I suspect there is more to you than meets the eye. I'd like to know about you. Would you mind?"

Susu hesitated, looked around, motioned to the now vacant hors d'oeuvres table, suggested they take their chairs and move to the table.

They were engaged in animated conversation throughout the main course. After the dessert, Susu left after cheek-kissing each of us, her smile artificial, perfunctory, indifferent. While we were sipping coffee, Wembley related Susu's story with his interpretation of her words and thoughts:

Caution: If you're under 40 and sordid unpleasant reality is offensive, it might be wise to skip the heartbreak tale of Susu's unfortunate experience: 

"I am not a verbal moron. I am a reader, do crossword puzzles, play scrabble with...with older johns when they can't...when they can't get it up and I'm fondling them.

"I was into theater at Wellesley and good at it, so everyone said. After I graduated - magna - third in my class, I tried out for an off-Broadway play. Standing in the wings that day, waiting to say my lines, I saw Glenn, the leading actor. Oh, how handsome he was standing there - tall, erect, elegant, a heroic figure on the stage, rehearsing his part.

"He was kind, helped me with timing and stage presence, gave me confidence. He used his influence, and I got small parts. But small parts or not, I was an actress! On the New York stage! Pretty heady stuff for a 22-year old.

"I played Lear, yes, Shakespeare. I was Goneril, a juicy part. She was a lying, scheming hypocrite. And everyone said how good I was."

(She closed her eyes, thinking, and recited Goneril's dishonest lines.) 

'Sir, I love you more than word can wield the matter/dearer than eyesight, space and liberty/beyond what can be valued rich or rare/no less than life, with grace, health, beauty, honor/as much as child e'er loved, or father found/a love than makes breath poor and speech unable/beyond all manner of so much I love you.'

"A beautiful sentiment, Wembley, but so much hypocriscy... Why must there be so much hypocrisy in the world? All lies, everything.

"Well, Glenn and I dated a few times alone. He was fun, made me laugh. We started attending parties with other members of the cast. Some were into grass, others sniffed coke. Glenn got high on horse - heroin...That's when I got hooked.

"Stars in my eyes blotted out my good sense. I became one of the crowd. First, grass - a nice dreamy high. But Glenn said that was kindergarten stuff. So I graduated to coke - a rush of exhilaration - like I am in a brave new world - just me alone, oblivious to everything. When the rush wore off, I couldn't give it up.

"Glenn was bedding me now. I was in love with him. He helped me get better acting parts.

"I'll never forget the day he convinced me to try horse. If I didn't like it, he said - so what the hell, I didn't need to repeat it, no problem. What should have crossed my mind, but didn't: I wasn't paying for all those drugs. Why?

"The horse was ecstasy. I was dancing on stars, my body pulsated...like in a never ending orgasm. It was my first time with horse and...I was hooked. Glenn refused to pony up for the stuff anymore. As a minor actress, I couldn't support the habit...I planned to hit the streets.

"I was a naïve innocent; Glenn a calculating rat! All along he played the game he was skilled at. He planned the end result for me from the first time we met. You see, the bastard also ran an escort service with five call girls. All needed money for their fixes...So, welcome, Susu, to the world of depravity. At first I was a big-money fancy call girl. Glenn would rotate us among his wealthy clients, many of whom had kinky sexual desires, which I was expected to satisfy."

(Wembley described her horrors with dykes and johns in much too graphic detail for me to relate in a wine column.)

"After Glenn's clients got tired of one of us they would insist on a new girl. Glenn kept rotating the six of us, so each would service all his johns and the few dykes. When Glenn would bring in a new girl, he would drop one of us; put us out on the streets with a few hundred bucks.

"So I ended up screwing for pimps in doorways, back alleys and parking lots -- now a professional prostitute...I'd like to shoot that son-of-a-bitch!"

(Tears rolled down Wembley's cheeks as he concluded the story.)

Main course and a home run for Chef Hammerstrom: thick, tasty, tender, medium-rare tenderloin of beef with creamy Dijon sauce; delicious with the Potel's Cotes de Nuits Villages (Pinot Noir) 2003, $27.99 - supple, aromatic, lush texture, loaded with persistent cherries, earthy nuances, nicely balanced.

Jason and Gurko said they might have preferred a softer Cote de Beaune with the tenderloin and wished they might have alternated tasting the Nuits and Beaune with the meat. Wembley accused them of pretentious nitpicking, evoking laughter from the table.

Finally, the piece de resistance, which I was able to resist: Helena Liazos' Napoleon of bananas and strawberries. This dessert was the little French general at the heavy, crusty time of his life although his berries were large and sweet.

Their faces glowing from the wine, food and homey ambience, the fearsome threesome warmly shook Jack's hand, showing their pleasure. Jack pumped his fist in triumph as he watched his fellow Chevaliers trudge gorged, glutted and smiling into the balmy summer's evening.

Next dinner: Annual July seafood/sparkling wines dinner- baked stuffed lobster, other fish and shellfish delights, Wednesday, July 19. Always a sellout; urge your early reservation: 508-757-7208.

Wine Pick: Goundry Shiraz 2003, $16, Western Australia: aromas of cherries, berries and spice; palate: rich berry fruit complemented with oak tannins and spice varieties; beautifully balanced with fruit acids, firm tannins and viscous texture; smooth swallow, lingering aftertaste. Great price/quality value.

Dry Creek Dry Chenin Blanc 2005, $11-$12, offers aromas of orange and lemon zest, pear and pineapple; flavors of green apple, citrus, lemon/lime, grapefruit are integrated into first sip; refreshing with balanced fruit acids; perfect for summer sipping; try it with shellfish or blue cheese dressed salad.

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julian@oxfordwineroom.com