Swoozie Frazzled, Jarko Exhausted

by Julian Schultz
julian@oxfordwineroom.com

             I thought Swoosie, who adds vivacity to the local wine scene, did look disturbed. “What’s bugging you, Swoos? This isn’t like you; you’re always so up, so…so bon vivant.” I was concerned: Her sly wit and saucy insouciance always add ebullience to our wine tastings and dinners. 

            “Have you checked your calendar?” she asked morosely. “How will you and I make all the tastings and dinners…and for you to write about them…if you’re still standing?”…Her voice trailed off. She put her wine glass down, and with slow, seductive undulating sway, swiveled her way toward the Castle’s “Queen’s” room. 

            I checked my pocket calendar. Wow! She was right. I began to worry about myself: about my sobriety, about my liver. I hadn’t realized – all the wine activity had sort of sneaked up on me.

             I defy anyone to say that Worcester is a wine “worm town!” Hell, we have more wine action here per capita than anyplace in New England! It comes thick and fast. And listed below are only the more important ones: 

            April 8, Castle wine dinner with premier boutique Stephen Ross luxury wines.

            April 9, Webster House wine dinner with pedigree Rodney Strong wines.

            April 9, Friendly Discount Liquors’ Grand Wine Tasting with over 100 wines.

            April 13, Castle wine tasting with Cabernet Sauvignons from the world over.

            April 14, Worcester Wine Tasters tasting with France’s ’98 Gigondas wines.

             Swoosie returned. “Well, how will we manage to do all these wine events?”

            “Oh, I’ll manage, all right,” I said, groaning, “but my liver and diet may not. Maybe I’ll report all the events in one column.” 

            Swoosie made a sour face: “Makes you a reporter bore, a dull diagnostic statistician; not your hedonistic style, your penning your passion with the pleasure principle, Julian.”

             I said that once again I would heed the wise words my departed beloved Lillian, warning me from the sky of space and forever: “You’d better eat frugally and sip lightly, or at home you’ll subsist on vitamins, a half grapefruit, four ounces baked beans and two poached eggs. And in late April you’ll get a liver checkup!” 

            “Partake of gourmet food and eat frugally? Sip pedigree wines but only lightly? Goodbye, my friend. You’re not for me. I…I’ve got more testosterone in my nether region than you have in yours.” Swoosie gestured at me with contempt, and to admiring stares of grinning macho males she slowly, seductively undulated, swayed and swiveled her way to taste with the welcoming good old boys.

             So resignedly I proffered my wine glass to Castle sommelier/maitre d’ Jim Nicas and sighted, swirled, sniffed, sipped, savored, spit the Marsannay 1999, $15, Louis Latour shipper. I returned to my little table to study the menu of the 19 wines we would taste and to record my notes.

             My heart bleeds for you if you missed this tasting. I’ve never spent $35 for a bigger bargain. My only protest: From 3 to 5 is not enough time to taste, spit and record my evaluations. I decided to taste rapidly, speak hurriedly to Jim and record my impressions speedily.

             Didn’t quite work out that way. A hapless, helpless taster, whom I had never seen before, interrupted me. Jim had suggested he seek me out for enlightenment about wine, he said.

             I saw a younger Tyrone Power look-alike at my side; swarthy, black almond-shaped eyes, wearing a tightly curled karakul hat that resembled an overturned flowerpot, and a broad green sash over the shoulder of his Clark University sweat shirt. He said his name was Jarko and that he was a graduate student at Clark. 

            Pointing to Cedric The Cheshire Cat Shakesneer, professor at Clark on sabbatical from Cambridge, England, and now a regular at these monthly tastings, he asked why Cedric was sniffing the white wine through his right nostril and red through his left. I said that I knew, but that we should let Cedric tell us.

             “To catch the coveted bouquet better,” Cedric said. “The bouquet delivers about 90 percent of a wine’s taste, and some people experience orgasmic ecstasy from bouquet. Let me tell you how bouquet became a fatal aphrodisiac for a student of mine at Cambridge.

             “After an active and vigorous night the dashing young Baron Von Wuchtig wiped his face with the exuberantly discarded nightie of his euphoric young lady friend. He was so overcome with ardent and insatiable passion for her that neither of them was seen from that moment on. Coroner’s report: ‘Two deaths from exhaustion and advanced old age.’ ”  

            I suggested to Jarko that if he wished to explore this blissful possibility, he must become sensitive to the complexities of bouquet and that the best place to start was with wine…with wine sniffed properly: “When you sniff, put your nose against the inside lip of the glass to smell better the esters that rise along the sides, and tilt the glass towards you. The bouquet will be immediately forthcoming and remarkably improved.” 

            Jarko began sniffing furiously, alternating with left and right nostrils. He said he hoped bouquet would work for him. I had to caution him to wait at least 15 seconds between sniffs because the olfactory sense becomes quickly jaded.

             He pointed to an attractive and well-upholstered, mini-mini-mini-skirted young woman bending over at the hors d’oeuvres table; a new friend, he said dreamily, and he would like to introduce her to the exotic merits and possibilities of bouquet. I told him to go for it.  

            Jarko pumped my hand with much fervor, bowing repeatedly and expressing his gratitude. He looked longingly at his attractive and well-upholstered, mini-mini-mini-skirted friend bending over the hors d’oeuvres table. He said he hoped that with luck…he would never see me again. 

            If I never see him again, or if hear that he died the good life, I will urge that his tombstone be inscribed with: ‘Way to go, Jarko!’

             The tasting. Nineteen wines: 11 from Burgundy; 8 from our West Coast. The verdict: Burgundy complexity prevails; its reputation intact; oldie and infant vintages palate pleasing; – only two fail to make the A-minus up to A-to-A plus category; the two just missing it with B-plus to A-minus rating, the other decidedly showing age and acidic sharpness -- B. 

            West Coast pinot noirs offered excellent fruit, but with few exceptions most were straightforward and one dimensional as compared with the Burgundies; all were pleasant and well balanced, but became monotonous with tasting the subsequent winery brands.

             The best of the best: Chambolle Musigny 2000 G. Barthod, $75 the bottle. My notes: “Nose overwhelmed with perfume of grapes; palate: fresh sweet grapes flood the mouth – almost candy-like, nuances of fresh bark, toast; tannin, texture, fruit acids balance; delicious; hard to spit (I swallowed!) Almost perfect.” Rating: A to A-plus.

 Domaine Laurier 1979 Sonoma, vintage no long available. “Nose: complex raisin-y, toasty; palate: very complex, unusual; balanced with soft tannin; soft, smooth swallow; long lingering; outstanding!” A to A-plus.

 Savigny Les Beaune “Les Lavieres” 1983 Bouchard, $75 the bottle, on the Castle’s wine list. Nose: “arresting, pleasing, mature, slightly musty; palate: intriguing complex fruit – spellbinding; letting it remain on my palate! Burnt, toasty swallow; long aftertaste.” A.

 Savigny les Beaune “Les Vergelesses” 1999 Jadot, $29. “soft floral, raspberries nose; palate: big raspberries, hints of beef, nuts, dried leaf; balanced, smooth, lingering; promises better things to come.” A.

 Volnay 2000 Jadot, $33. “floral, lots of plum on nose and palate; some black tea, cooked raisins, hint cinnamon; an altogether wine; elegant.” A. 

A-minus to A-Rated Wines: 

Cote de Nuits Villages 1999 Jadot, $19. “ feminine on nose with plums and raisins; cherries and nutty complexity on palate; balanced, smooth, moderate length.”  

Vosne Romanee 1997 Jadot, $33. “fresh berries, tart currants on nose; palate: big plum taste emerges with berries complexity; zesty tartness, balanced, lingering.”  

Archery Summit “1er Cuveé” Oregon 2000, $35. “Nose: smoky, fruity; palate: smoky, blackberries, some raisins, some game, hint leather, nuts; balanced, smooth.”  

 A-minus- Rated wines:  

Marsanny 1999 Latour, $15.

Chorey les Beaune 1999 Jadot, $17.

Both wines had immediate berry, plum-y noses that disappeared quickly; light plum, cherry fruit on the palate with delightful lively tartness balance, the latter especially in the Marsanny. Both wines were nicely balanced with lingering aftertaste – perhaps deserving the A-minus to A rating.

Mayo “Saralees” 2000 Sonoma, $33. “Complex nose – interesting unusual aromas; palate: forward, arresting tastes of berries, cherries, underlaid with hints of leather, cinnamon, nuts; odd swallow, not bad, pretty good; worth investigating.”

Byron 1999 Santa Maria, $29. “Nose: fresh, grapey, raisin-y; palate: candy-like sweet plum, cherry fruit; nicely balancing tart fruit acids, subtlety of butterscotch; unlike any of 11 just previously tasted Burgundies.”

 B-Plus to A-Minus-Rated Wines:

 Vosne Romanee “Les Orveaux” Mungeret 1983, $75 the bottle, on Castle’s wine list.

Volnay Ponelle 1983, $75 the bottle, on Castle’s wine list.

Foley 2000 Santa Barbara 2000, $31.

Lane Turner Bien Nacido Santa Barbara 2001, $35.

Hinman Oregon 2000, $14.

I was on the defensive with the ratings of these wines, especially the Vosne Romanee. One taster, in particular, chided me for my evaluation: “Nose: delicatessen meat, fading complexity; palate: intensely stewed raisin-y with unbalanced tastes of cooked beef, leather, smoke -- maybe stale nutty complexity; slight mustiness, sharpness, shows complexity of old-aged maturity; just not my cup of tea.” The dissenter lauded the Vosne Romanee, “a treasure!”

 Other tasters liked the sweet comfortable fruit of the West Coast wines, their easy balance and their lingering aftertaste, applying ratings from 88 to 91.

 One taster playfully accused me of Burgundy bias throughout the tasting because I am a member of the Chevaliers du Tastevin and I am afraid Grand Senechal Jerry Kraft would kick me out of the prestigious organization.

 Interspersed with tasting the 19 wines was tasting Grand Master chef Stanley Nicas’ usual delectable hors d’oeuvres: Swedish meat balls in lemon/egg sauce; feta cheese/spinach pita triangles in phyllo; Muenster, Cheddar, Blue Tobias cheeses; green and purple grapes, fresh giant sweet strawberry halves, cantaloupe; cracker variety.

 Wine Pick: Victor Hugo Zinfandel 1999, $19. A zinfandel complete with all cherished zin attributes: blueberries, spice, pepper, plums, toasty wood, raisins; even Port-like; nicely balanced with fruit acids, soft tannin, velvety texture; smooth swallow and extended aftertaste. Will achieve greater complexity with bottle age. A superb representation of zinfandel.

 Wine Pick: Robert Mondavi Private Selection Merlot 2001, $12. Blended the eight percent pinot noir for complexity. Forward fruit flavors of ripe berries and plums, with nuances of violets and warm spices; embracing with soft, silky tannin and balancing fruit acids; smooth swallow and pleasing comfortable aftertaste. Big bargain!

 Wine Pick: Messapicus Salice Salentino (Apulia) 1998, $8.99. Blend of malvasia nero and negro amaro grapes create fruit-packed layers of boysenberry, cherry and black raspberry flavors, finished dry with currant and cassis subtleties; intriguing smoke, fruit and fruit acids balance; pleasing swallow, lingering aftertaste. Price is almost too good to be true. Seek it out!